


10 Things I Hate About You

by dyve_the_author



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, Humanstuck, Inspired by 10 Things I Hate About You (1999), Kankri is older than them, Karkat and Kanaya are half siblings, M/M, POV Second Person, Strilalondes are still the same, my friends asked for this-
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-09-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:00:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25837675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dyve_the_author/pseuds/dyve_the_author
Summary: Preppy teen, Kanaya Maryam has, been living with her half brother, Karkat Vantas, who can pretty much be described as her polar opposite. The number one rule in their home is no dating until you graduate. Complications arise when Kanaya has her eye on a certain Serket and tries to convince her half father to let it slip by. The rule gets reinforced, but not in the way she hoped it would.
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas, Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam
Comments: 8
Kudos: 22





	1. Characters

Katerina Stratford: Karkat Vantas

Bianca Stratford: Kanaya Maryam

Cameron James: Rose Lalonde 

Patrick Verona: Dave Strider

Joey Donner: Vriska Serket

Michael: John Egbert 

Mr. Stratford: Kankri Vantas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m a sucker for romance and 10 Things I Hate About You is one of my favorite romance movies. Also Kat and Patrick’s characters are just Dave and Karkat in a different font. I’ve also had this idea for a while and decided to finally write it.


	2. Complications Arise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kanaya asked for change in a household rule. This makes her bite off more than she can chew.

You are Kanaya Maryam, and you’ve just asked your father to reinforce the household rule. He obliged, but not in the way you’d hoped. For some background, you’ve had feelings for Vriska Serket for a while and despite your attraction towards her you can’t date her. It’s all because of the golden rule your half father set up. The golden rule, as he calls it, is there to prevent anything terrible from happening to you and your brother, Karkat. You’ve always abided by this rule closely and never strayed from it. One day, however, Vriska was kind enough to drive you home. This peaked your attraction for her. Dating her was a now or never situation. After some careful consideration, you gained enough courage to ask your dad for a rule change. He unexpectedly agreed but, as you should’ve known, there was a catch. The only time you can date is when Karkat does. 

This irritates you because Karkat can only be described as _different_. He isn’t like you, but he isn’t like Kankri either. He has his own personality which isn’t to say that’s bad, but the personality he has makes it hard for him to meet people and for people to like him. His tough and angry exterior makes it easy for him to mess with. He’s told you that Vriska is the main person that causes the teasing, but you can’t see that as possible. Now back to the present. You’re recovering from the new information you’ve received. You look over at Karkat who’s wearing a satisfied grin. “What are you smiling at?” You say, trying to hide the anger in your voice. He coughs and his face straightens, “Nothing.” “Are you sure Vantas?” You ask. He nods. You glare at him. 

“What?” he groans, setting his book down on the coffee table. “Can you please just find someone to date? I don’t care who, I promise I won’t judge.” You plead. Karkat sighs and rubs his temples, “It’s not that.” “Than what is it?” “Who have you decided to bend the rule for?” He asks. You stand there in silence. He knows doesn’t he? “Just as I thought. It’s Vriska isn’t it?” He stands up. “She’s nice one you get to know her-” “No I’m not taking this bullshit again. Every time you tell me this and I believe it, she does some ungodly thing that brings me right back to my initial opinion.” “What did she even do to you? What ungodly thing did she do to you to make you hate her?” You shout, anger spilling from your voice. It’s his turn to stay quiet now. He takes a couple steps back, he realizes he’s stepping into dangerous territory. Karkat snatches his book and whispers a quick “sorry” before scurrying upstairs. 

You’re fuming with anger, yet you’re somehow able to contain it. You trudge upstairs a little bit after him. You open the door to your room and flop on your bed. You feel like you’re about to get a headache. Between rule changes and Karkat accusing Vriska of doing something wrong, your head has been spinning. You have Vriska’s phone number in hand and you decide to call her. Your phone rings for a bit, but she doesn’t pick up. “Maybe she’s busy.” you say to yourself before putting your phone down. You sigh. You really need someone to talk to about all this. You get up from your bed and make your way over to your desk. You pull out a needle and thread and continue working on your latest dress. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh damn what kind of trauma did vriska give karkat????


	3. New Kids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose and her brother, Dave, are the new kids and are given a tour around campus by none other than John Egbert.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh yeah, it’s strilalonde time boys. this is the longest chapter as of right now, so be prepared.

Your name is Rose Lalonde, and you’ve just stepped foot into your high school campus. It’s the first time you’ve been here, considering you’re new, but you’re not here alone. You can hear your brother huff as he lugs his messenger bag out of the car. You’re not sure why he carries that old thing around, but you don’t question it. You look back at the car and see Roxy wave at you two. You both wave back. “So what do you think is going to happen? Do you think it’ll be as shitty as our old school?” Dave asks. You groan, “Oh please, the only reason it was shitty for you is because you got suspended for pulling a knife out on a kid.” “Hey, it was self defense.” He retorts. “I’m telling you, it’s the trauma.” You joke. He pauses for a moment, thinking of a witty comeback. “Fuck you Rose. Quit being right.” he says after a while. You chuckle. Dave‘s been through a lot. Before Roxy and Dirk took him into custody, he was living with your abusive father. Luckily, you and your two older siblings managed to get away. Dave was not. You managed to save him, but the abuse had gotten to him. He grew up a little unordinary, to put it lightly. The trauma caused him to freak out at times. It made him a little apathetic and it’s a lot harder for him to control his emotions. The worst it got was in eighth grade when he stabbed a kid for teasing him about his red eyes and skittish behavior. You sigh at these memories as you walk through the halls to meet with your guide. As you pass by, you can see people look at your brother and whisper to one another. Dave, however, doesn’t seem to notice. Maybe he just doesn’t care anymore. Or even worse, maybe he’s used to it.

You approach a boy with black hair and square framed glasses. You extend your arm out for a handshake, “Hello. You must be John right?” He returns the gesture, “Yep. And you’re Rose?” You nod. You eye Dave, expecting him to introduce himself. He messes with the strap of his messenger bag before making eye contact with you. He immediately gets the message and shakes John’s hand as well. “Dave. Dave Strider.” he says. John nods, “Nice to meet you too Dave.” John turns around and motions you to follow him. You and Dave trail behind as he leads you to the courtyard. John points out the different cliques as you make your way through the courtyard. As you’re walking, you catch a glimpse of a tan girl with short black hair. Her eyes are a deep jade color. For some odd reason, you can’t stop staring. You stop John mid sentence to ask him who she is. “Who is she?” you ask, tapping his shoulder. He looks at her too and deflates, “Oh, her.” You give him a confused look, “What’s wrong with her?” “Look, Rose, don’t even try to get with her alright?” he sighs. “What? Why not? She’s perfect I can’t lose someone like her!” you explain. You need her in your life. It’s a feeling you can’t explain. 

“That’s Kanaya Maryam, and she’s not worth your time. None of us guys are even allowed near her. Her father is an attack helicopter and won’t let her or her brother date.” John explains. “It’s best to just leave it alone and move on.” “John if there’s anything you need to learn about my sister, it’s that she doesn’t give up. She will do anything to get what she wants.” Dave chuckles. “He’s not wrong.” You agree. John looks between you and Kanaya, “Well if you’re that desperate she actually needs a tutor for French.” You light up, “That’s great!” “Oh, you know some French?” “Rose is full of surprises.” Dave jokes. You smile, hoping to get John’s approval. He sighs, “Fine I guess I’ll help you get with her.” You squeal and thank him. 

————————————

The next day, you meet with Kanaya for French tutoring. She sits down across from you and lets out a deep breath, “I’m sorry, but can we please make this quick? I’ve got a prom dress to deliver.” “Oh, well if now’s not a good time maybe we should start with French food. We could eat some together, say, Saturday evening?” you offer. You can see her face turn red. “Are you offering to take me out on a date?” she gasps. You nod. “Awe, that’s so cute.” she blushes. “I know your dad forbids you from dating but-” “Wait Rose,” she cuts you off. “My dad made a new rule. I can date when my brother does.” “Really? That’s great!” you exclaim. “I know, but there’s a small problem with that.” she adds. “What is it?” “My brother is, well, he’s different to say the least. He’s a bit cold and tempestuous.” “Oh.” you shrink in your chair, thinking of an idea at the top of your head. Suddenly, it comes rushing to you. “Hey, what if I find someone for your brother to date?” you ask. “You’d find someone as eccentric as my brother just for me?” she asks. You nod. “You’re so sweet Rose!” she says, kissing your cheek. “Well I’ve got to go now, but tell me if you need help with the search or if you find someone.” “Sure will.” you smile. You get up and rush to gather Dave and John. You find them waiting for you in the hallway. You look over at Dave who’s flirting with a shorter boy who looks a bit like Kanaya, except with red eyes. He looks agitated and storms off. Dave chuckles and turns to face you, “So how’d it go?” “Better than I’d expected. Turns out she can date when her brother does.” you explain excitedly. John, however, sighs an exasperated sigh. “What’s wrong now?” you groan. “In case you haven’t heard, her brother is very aggressive. In fact, your very own brother was flirting with him.” You’re just as surprised as Dave. “What?” you both shout in unison. “Yep. The one and only Karkat Vantas. He’s a bit anti-social but I mean we could try to find someone who can match up with him.” John offers. You nod as the three of you go your separate ways to find Karkat’s perfect match. 

It’s no use. You all go through your picks and none of them have the balls to ask him out. You groan, “Goddammit! None of them want to be with him.” Dave throws his pocket knife at a dart board and manages to throw it to the middle. He pushes up his shades. “Looks like you’re out of luck sis.” he says, taking a sip of his apple juice. You groan and slouch in your chair. John lights up, “I got it!” “What’s up?” Dave asks. “How about you give it a shot Dave?” John asks. He chuckles, “Nah.” You look on in defeat as John tries to convince him. “Come on man! You’d be perfect for him! You’re a bit eccentric if I say so myself. Besides, you were flirting with him just a couple minutes ago what’s so different now?” “Not much I guess. But you gotta understand Egbert, flirting is all fun and games. I don’t actually mean it, even if he is pretty damn cute.” “See?” John exclaims. You sit there in silence thinking about what John said. Maybe Dave would make a good candidate for Karkat. He’s your brother, maybe if you convince him enough he’ll do it. “Can you please do it? For me?” you plead. Dave looks at you sympathetically. He knows you’re trying to convince him, yet he doesn’t want to disappoint you. “Fine.” he sighs. You and John whoop with excitement as you get on with your plan.

“Well what’s our next move?” you ask. “We’re going to need a backer.” John replies. “A backer?” Dave inquires. “Someone with money who’s stupid.” John elaborates. You and Dave snicker. “We’re going to need someone to pay you so it doesn’t seem suspicious.” John continues. “Hey, how about Vriska? She’ll think that she’s getting Kanaya when it’s actually me.” you suggest. John considers this idea and nods, “Hm, that could work. You sure are smart Rose.” “I try my best.” you smirk. All you need is to get Vriska to agree with the idea and you’re all set.


	4. The Backer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John tries to convince Vriska to pay Dave into dating Karkat.

You are John Egbert, and you’re about to convince Vriska to pay Dave into dating Karkat. Vriska Serket is known as the biggest bitch in the school. No one dares to cross her path, not even you. You’re not scared of her it’s just that you’ve had to deal with her so many times that you’re tired of it. You hate everything about her. She’s an asshole for one, and two she’s the kind of girl who can get her way with anything. You sigh and sit next to her. She looks at you, disgusted. “Oh, it’s just you Egbert. Thought it was some hot shot that decided to sit over here.” she snarls. “Vriska, I’m not here to confront you about your bitchy tendencies. I’m here to make an offer.” you sigh. She pretends to gasp, “An offer? Why John of course I’d love to hear it. Tell us what this offer is?” You groan. You knew this was a bad idea. You go along with it anyways. “So, I’ve heard that you wanted to get with Kanaya.” you bring up. She growls, “Yeah. What about it?” “You can’t date her because her dad won’t allow it. However, I just heard that he established a new rule.” This seems to peak her interest as she sits upright. “Really now?” she asks. You nod. “Well, spill the beans Egbert.” “Kanaya can’t date until Karkat does.” you reply. She groans, “Ugh, not that guy. I hate that guy!” “I know, but I do have a solution.” Vriska immediately becomes engaged in the conversation again, “Oh?” You point to Dave who’s sitting strategically in Vriska’s line of sight. “You know that guy?” you ask. She nods, “Yeah. Heard he went ape shit at his old school and almost killed a kid.” You dismiss this, just wanting to get it over with, “Yeah well clearly he might be a solid candidate for him.” Vriska sits there pondering. She’s thinking about it.

She seems like she’s convinced until she glares at you. “What’s in its for you?” she stands up. You put your hands up, “Nothing. Just wanted to run a quick idea by you to see if you’re interested.” She sits back down and takes a deep breath. She’s considering the idea. “Fine. I’ll try to get that psycho to go out with him.” she rolls her eyes in defeat. You nod, holding in your excitement. You get up from the table to avoid anymore conversation. Rose stands by the lunchroom anxiously. “What happened?” she asks. “It went surprisingly well. She agreed to the idea with little to no questions asked.” you reply smoothly. Rose sighs with relief, “Oh thank god.” Dave catches up with you guys a little bit after. “So did she agree?” he asks. You and Rose nod in unison. Dave’s shoulders relax. “Good.” he says. “Now what?” Rose asks. “Now we wait until Dave gets the payment for sure.” The three of you walk outside to the field where Karkat and some other guys are having soccer practice. Dave sits on a bench near the field while you and Rose sit on the bleachers. You see Vriska heave as she walks up to him. She puts her arm on his shoulder and points to Karkat, explaining the deal. He shakes his head and chuckles. You look over at Rose who’s biting her nails and hoping this all goes well. The same could be said for you too. 

Vriska is unpredictable and can change her mind on a whim. Thank god she keeps trying to persuade Dave. You see her making exaggerated hand gestures to emphasize the point. Dave’s talking to her and she stiffens. She snarls at him, but he shrugs in response. She tenses up and you can see her practically yelling at Dave, but he doesn’t flinch. He explains the situation calmly before pushing up his shades. She huffs and gives him the money before fleeing from the field. Dave turns around to look at you and Rose. He gives you guys a thumbs up as the two of you sigh with relief. Rose puts a hand to her head, “Oh boy. Lets just hope the flirting goes well.” You nod. Karkat, like Vriska, is a wild card. Sometimes when the two of you talk, you’ll agree on certain things. Other times he tells you to piss off and so you do. He’s easy to tease and easy to get a reaction out of, but his anger induced ramblings are something no one wants a part of. Rose fidgets with her fingers as Dave waltzes over to Karkat. You gently pat her back, “It’ll be alright Rose. Dave is a natural at acting. Karkat, well, he’s just hard to get.” She giggles lightly. You turn your attention back to Dave and watch as he tries to flirt with the one and only Karkat Vantas. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy Vriska, you have no idea you’re being played huh?
> 
> Also this one is one of the shorter chapters because I want to write Dave trying his best to flirt with Karkat in the next chapter. Trust me when I say that I tried to make this one longer.


	5. Flirtatious Douche

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave tries his best to flirt with Karkat as Rose and John watch from the bleachers.

You are Dave Strider, and Vriska Serket has just paid you $50 to go out with Karkat. Your sister had already convinced you to hook up with him, and you had already agreed. She just needed to use Vriska as a distraction which in turn puts you on the spot. If you fail this, the whole plan falls apart. You’ve been warned relentlessly by Rose not to mess this up. She’s a bit of a perfectionist, but you don’t mind. As long as it’s not your feelings on the line right? You walk up to Karkat silently. It takes him a while to realize that you’re there, but when he does he jumps.

“Jeegus christ Strider you scared the shit out of me.” he curses. You chuckle, “Well that’s one way to get my attention.” “I should be the one telling you that.” he snarls, putting his equipment away in a bag. “But obviously I’ve struck your fancy so I guess it worked.” he attempts to put the bag over his shoulder but fails due to the weight. You help him put the strap over his shoulder. “Thanks.” he huffs. You nod. “Why the hell are you over here anyways?” he asks annoyed. “Just wanted to talk.” you shrug. “Talk? Really?” he narrows his eyes. “Mhm.” you nod your head. “What’s there to talk about? I just met you a couple minutes ago screw boy.” he replies clearly irritated. This isn’t going well. You had a better vision in your head about this. But then again, nothing ever goes as you plan it. He’s about to leave before you start speaking again.

“I don’t know.” You shrug, trying to play it cool and look nonchalant. This backfires as Karkat seems more pissed off by this than anything. He turns back around to face you. “So you’re telling me that you walked over here but couldn’t think of a topic to at least make this conversation interesting or less awkward than it already is?” he asks. You tilt your head to the side, “I guess you could phrase it like that.” He facepalms. “How did I manage to attract the most idiotic, yet flirtatious, douchebag in the entire school?” He groans. You’re not really sure if that’s a compliment or not. If it was, what kind of compliment is that?

“Was that a compliment?” you ask. Karkat freezes for a second, rethinking what he just said. His shoulders tense up for a bit before relaxing again. He turns to face you, and your eyes meet. You can see his face clearer now. He has neatly placed freckles, a mop of black curly hair, and gray eyes. He seems lost in thought so you wave your hand in front of him. “Hey, dude, you good?” He tilts his head back and sighs. At least he’s alive. “Yes, I’m fine. And no, it wasn’t a compliment. God even when I try to insult you it goes haywire.” he glares. “I wouldn’t say it went haywire but sure.” you comment. He rolls his eyes, “You’re such a prick.” “You won’t be saying that when you really get to know me though, will you?” you wink even though you know he can’t see it. “Yeah, well, we’ll see about that.” he turns back around, ending the conversation. Great, it’s already gone way pass shitty. You’ve now passed the town of surface shit and now you’re in deep shit valley. Okay, that sounds weird, you need to stop making up metaphors in your head. You strive for one last chance. This can’t be how your first interaction goes. You make an attempt at one last offer.

“Pick you up on Friday then?” you suggest. He whips his head around to face you, “Are you kidding me?” “Hey, I could take you places you’ve never been.” you smirk. He rolls his eyes, “Do you even know my name asshole?” “I know a lot more about you than you think.” you reply. He sighs and faces away from you, “Doubtful. _Very_ doubtful.” He walks away from you and you figure that’s your cue to leave so you do. You walk over to the bleachers where Rose and John are sitting. You hop over the first set and make your way to them.

“We’re screwed.” Rose sighs as you sit down. “Hey, I don’t want to hear that negative attitude. Try to be more positive about it.” John reassures. “We’re screwed!” Rose says again. Happier this time, but sarcastically. “Much better.” John replies jokingly. The three of you laugh it off but deep down you’re really hoping it worked. You’re not sure why though. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> davekat stan’s come get your juice! anyways, i finally got around to actually writing a davekat scene so yay. uh, spoiler warning i guess, dave doesn’t fail with the flirting.


End file.
